1. You are totally not obsessed
Personal Facebook post gets flooded with more comments and likes than normal. You try desperately to keep it going, then check your Klout score every 5 minutes for the next three days.
2. You are not competitive at all
3. You never use your social standing as blackmail
For tech support questions on a tool, your thought process goes: Where is their Twitter handle? –> Found it! –> How do I phrase this issue in 140 characters or less? Nobody ever uses contact support forms anymore, right?! (because that won’t get you any new followers)… That little evil part of you knows the brand will reply because all your followers will see you have an issue with their product. Blackmail or customer engagement?
4. You totally keep your tools to a minimum
You have at least two social media platforms on each device and have tried or are still using at least 3 browser extensions, tablet apps, smartphone apps, desktop apps. You’re always open to more though. When you explain to your co-workers that these are integral parts of “hacking the main-frame”, they tolerantly smile and nod their heads.
5. You don’t let notifications interrupt your life
Of the aforementioned social media tools, push notifications announce every new like, comment, call, notification, message or Tweet. On every tool. On every device.
Hey, what if one of your devices is not with you?! You are mobile, for godsakes, this is 2015, you are not chained to your desk.
6. You are completely cool with Google+
The mere existence of Google+ makes you roll your eyes and scowl, but you are on it anyway.
Aaand you update your cover photo at least once per month. Hey, you have a reputation to maintain.
7. You never use your powers for evil
If you are under 18, your parents are on Facebook and you do your best to post enough so that they don’t realize that your *real* social media accounts are Vine, Instagram, Whats App, and SnapChat. If you are over 25, Facebook holds every photo of your life dating back to its glorious inception in 2007. You didn’t have to delete your boozer photos because you are a master of privacy settings and simply hid them from everyone but your close pals.
If you could relate to any these, don’t worry, you are perfectly normal–totally normal–I mean everyone does this, right?